It's Just Me

At various times in my 55 years, I have been described as a Welsh Dutchman, a rockspider, a racist, a kafferboetie, a troublemaker, the best speaker in Africa, a hero, a shit, a leader, an angel, a demon-slayer, a drunk, a genius, the toughest consumer in Africa, scary, a pansy with presence, a patriot, a pathetic old pessimist, bloody dangerous, a management terrorist, a cor4porate activist and a friend. I think I like the last one best.

As for South Africa, I agree with Leonard Cohen: 'I love this country, but I can't stand the scene.'"

With 19 awards in Afrikaans and English (by which I lay much), degrees (by which I lay little), I've worked on almost every paper in South Africa from the Rand Daily Mail to Sowetan, as an actor, spin doctor and corporate pimp up to the director level. I've also plumbed the depths and I've been put away.

I believe in God. my two galactic sons, my celestial daughter-in-law and my grandson, Nathan (by which I lay all). I have no idea what I am capable of.

- Mark Twain

"A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain."

- Susan Boyle

"I'm not going to be frightened any more."

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